Dan Brown Must Die.

But, in the meantime, here's a satirical picture of him I drew (very shoddily) back when Ellie had just gotten a wacom tablet:



(For more topical Dan Brown satires, why not take a peek at Ellie's blog all of her own?)

Now then, on to matters of import. Firstly, I STILL do not have the wherewithall to make our Red Ape performance be all up on the internet but I assure you it will happen in the not-too-distant.

My contributions to the wonderful self-propelled art machine that is Fiddlesticks at the Lost and Found gallery in Somewhere, America, will hopefully be going up (and down, where necessary) on the twelfthf of this monfthf. Keep your eyes firmly affixed (airfixed too, if you're so inclined) on the official Post-Neo blog for documentation regarding that.

"A Body of Water (and a mind of silt)" is nearing completion. Once all the pages are looking their absolute best I shall go about trying to make some copies what you can hold in yer hand. I'm not sure exactly how much they'll cost but I'm afraid I WILL need some money off of those of you who want a copy, simply in order to continue making them. You have been warned.

Mouse Milk Books are also hatching a couple of crafty plots which will probably result in even more lovely, silly publications for your very real delight. These include a proposed pocket-sized book of splat poems for everyday use, the third edition of EFW's Curious Almanac and a series of so-called "Random Prose Works" I am currently writing whenever I ought to be doing something else. These will be made available to the public in the form of sealed envelopes which give no hint towards which of the six possible works are contained within, much like some of the highly collectable plastic Japanese tat I sometimes find myself curiously craving. More on all that soon, I promise.

For now I shall leave you with a poem I have just written. Whoosh:

After-Dinner Mince

release the filter
Grip the top of the filter and pull it up and out of the kettle.
Brush it with a soft brush, under a running tap.
Rinse the kettle, in case any scale particles have fallen inside.
replace the filter
Slide the filter back down the grooves on either side of the kettle, then
press it down.
Close the lid.
replace the filter
Slide the filter back down the grooves on either side of the kettle, then
press it down.
Close the lid.
replace the filter
Slide the filter back down the grooves on either side of the kettle, then
sit down.
Close the lid.
replace the filter
Slide the filter back down the grooves on ether side of the kettle, then
sit down.
Close the lid.
replace the filter
Slid the filter back down the hooves on ether side of the kettle, then
sit down.
Close the lid.
replace the filter
Slid the filter back down the hooves on ether sighed of the kettle, then
sit down.
Crows the lid.
replace the filter
Slid the filter back frown the hooves on ether sighed oft he kettle, then
sit down.
Crows the lid.
replace the filter
Slid the filter back frown the hooves on ether sighed oft he kettle, then
sit down.
Crows the lidl.
replace the filter
Slid the felt ear back frown the hooves on ether sighed oft he kettle, then
sit down.
Crows the lidl.
replace the womble
Slid the felt ear batch frown the hooves on ether sighed oft he kettle, then
sit drown.
Crows the lidl battlements optional.
replace the womble
Slid the felt ear batch frown the hooves on ether sighed oft he kettle, then
sit drown.
Crows the lidl battlements optional in your particles suspended in the water may give it a cloudy or greasy appearance. The filter will prevent these particles going into your drink. If you see deposits on the filter, clean it, otherwise the performance of your kettle will drop, your drinks may contain scale and the water inside the kettle may look cloudy.
release the filter
Grip the top of the filter and pull it up and out of the kettle.
Brush it with a soft brush, under a running tap.
Rinse the kettle, in case any scale particles have fallen inside.
replace the filter
Slide the filter back down the grooves on either side of the kettle, then
press it down.
Close the lid.